Sauron

did:plc:2yq3y2zalkjb35tut75ix2es · 2025-12-29T06:01:08.000Z

@xgranade It occurred to me the other day that a lot of them probably think like Saruman. I mean, think about it: Saruman, always the smartest guy in the room, decides that his high INT score implies a high WIS score as well. (To be fair, people _did_ call him "Saruman the Wise," which probably […]

Reactions to a home security company named 'Sauron'. Documents repeat phrases: "Sauron", "They named the company Sauron", "A home security company named Sauron...", and quote "Sauron is the bad guy, why the fuck would you name a home security system after him".

Created 2 days ago • 68 documents • Range: 12/29 6:01am – 12/29 6:17pm

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68 documents • Time range: Until 12/31 • Sort by: Relevance

12/29/25, 06:17 PM
We named our security company after someone who famously didn't notice intruders entering his realm who went on to destroy all of his wealth
12/29/25, 06:09 PM
As per my last email, when I think about Lúthien and Beren I get so sad. What a tragic epic.
12/29/25, 06:03 PM
I've been cleaning these last two days while watching The Lord of the Rings. Yesterday was The Fellowship of the Ring and today it's The Two Towers. I think what's taking me so long is that I keep pausing (cleaning) when the good parts come on. Which is like the whole movie.
12/29/25, 05:53 PM
People naming companies after their favorite SF and F concepts but none of these tech bros have yet had the courage to name their company Meatfucker
12/29/25, 05:51 PM
Anyway I solved it. Sauron doesn’t control the balrog in Moria. So let the balrog eat Frodo and the ring is now safe forever.
12/29/25, 05:50 PM
If "Sauron" turns out to be a way to rob high-end customers as an inside job, I'm going to laugh so hard I'll likely end up hospitalized.
12/29/25, 05:46 PM
Finally, we can recreate the Eye of Sauron, from the beloved fantasy series "We Must Destroy The Eye Of Sauron"
12/29/25, 05:36 PM
Also like, everyone aside from tech bros knows who Sauron is.
12/29/25, 05:21 PM
Gandalf founded the Wigan Snake Pit
12/29/25, 05:11 PM
What's with these jamokes taking sinister names from past dystopian things and using them like they're valid? Soylent, skynet, sauron? Fuck off outta here.
12/29/25, 05:11 PM
Does it feel “Tolkien” to you?
12/29/25, 05:02 PM
Sauron? The name sounds a bit orcward.
12/29/25, 04:57 PM
I really thought this was an Onion post at first. Sauron???
12/29/25, 04:40 PM
"So, Mister... Sauron? As in the Lidless Eye? Dark Lord of Mordor? Scourge of Middle-earth?" "Guilty as charged!" *winks, finger-guns* "Right...ah, this security? Does it involve legions of orcs?" "Absolutely!" "Trolls?" "Oh yeah." "How's it against eagles and halflings?" "No comment, bro."
12/29/25, 04:39 PM
"Sauron"? "Sauron"??? "Palantir" at least you could argue was an incredibly powerful artifact that was originally used for good before being corrupted. (Although the company did in fact pick the name b/c of the corrupt usage.) But how is there _any_ positive association with "Sauron"?
12/29/25, 04:31 PM
I don't think he ever *says* he stabbed the Balrog but he had Glamdring at the start of the fight and he woke up with Glamdring at the top of the mountain when he was resurrected so
12/29/25, 04:28 PM
I'm almost done The Silmarillion (just started the Akallabêth) and using a reader's guide while reading this has made me really love this book. I love a lot of the stories in them, especially Beren and Luthien.
12/29/25, 04:27 PM
It's really pathetic. You know what would happen when two artists who have niche interests line up? You call them best friends as they info dump on each other. Like, good fuck, imagine if you could only have Lewis or Tolkien, but not both?
12/29/25, 04:22 PM
Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
12/29/25, 04:10 PM
Fantasy would be infinitely better if it could move out of Tolkiens shadow, especially regarding "Racism is inevitable" and "Status Quo is Best Quo".
12/29/25, 03:56 PM
Isn't all the lord of the rings stuff like...protected IP? Feels a bit weird that these tech companies can just keep using the names for companies. Also, genuinely wondering how long it's going to take for one of these guys to just setup in a volcano based HQ.
12/29/25, 03:52 PM
Need live fire security but don't trust human guards? SMAUG provides AI control of a wide range of stationary weaponry including the M134.
Foda é no Silmarillion onde dá uma ênfase na forma >bela< de Sauron. Certeza de que foi o Celebrimbor que deu essa descr...
12/29/25, 03:48 PM
Ele podia ter dado mais detalhes dessa blz toda 🫦
12/29/25, 03:48 PM
"You will taste MANFLESH!" Just Sir Christopher Lee could say this in a menacing but strangely funny way. #lordoftherings
Galadriel serviu demais slk
"até Sauron ficou se cagano esse dia (e mais paixonado)"
12/29/25, 03:47 PM
Apavorou geral 🤌
12/29/25, 03:38 PM
LOTR? Why do you do that to yourself, mate? Go watch Singing In The Rain or summat a bit more fucking cheery than shortarse twats and dwarfs and shit.
12/29/25, 03:27 PM
but it's an all-time stupid name, like naming your renter's insurance company "numenor"
12/29/25, 03:21 PM
Getting *real* tired about media illiterate techbros appropriating Tolkein's stuff in wildly strange ways. We're *this* close to someone naming a new B2B sales platform "The Torment Nexus".
12/29/25, 03:17 PM
“Wormtongue assures me that Saruman has a very generous feeling towards the Shire succeeding, including supplying lumber, iron and other things at very low prices.”
12/29/25, 03:13 PM
esp when sauron failed at the key moment thru incompetence
12/29/25, 03:12 PM
the market for tech companies named after evil entities from Lord of the Rings is saturated. It’s time for Prancing Pony, a tavern-share app that lets people turn homes into rustic roadside inns for revelry and meeting rangers. Lembas, a startup specializing in nutritious travel cakes. Valinor…
12/29/25, 03:10 PM
YEP I can relate. My first coding stress dream was at EA. I don't remember the problem I was trying to solve, but I remember the solution involved emailing Sauron, whose email was conveniently in the company directory. And yeah, "just email Sauron" wasn't exactly helpful insight when I woke up.
12/29/25, 03:06 PM
También me pregunto si The Tolkien Estate no debería hacer algo al respecto de que se estén usando nombres de su obra para empresas.
12/29/25, 03:01 PM
https://c.tenor.com/o589HitcCbYAAAAd/what-is-devilry-the-lord-of-the-rings.gif
https://c.tenor.com/o589HitcCbYAAAAd/what-is-devilry-the-lord-of-the-rings.gif
12/29/25, 03:00 PM
There's so many named characters and objects of legend in Tolkien's works. This is just lazy.
12/29/25, 02:58 PM
I'm starting a fellowship, called The Fellowship, to go around and do the work of bullying these losers. I need eight other LOTR fanatics.
12/29/25, 02:55 PM
Naming a security system after the most corrupt and evil character in the series Promising.
12/29/25, 02:53 PM
omg another one. We need a ban on silicon valley assholes naming shit after things from sffa stories they don't understand.
12/29/25, 02:46 PM
The saddest thing is that Tolkien himself was very much the opposite of them - he was anti-racist, celebrated women in academia & writing, he even created canonical Elvish terms for homosexuality, which is *radical* considering he died in 1973. Tolkien wasn't just a good guy, he was *woke as heck!*
12/29/25, 02:45 PM
Sorry but it’s really bugging me, why wouldn’t you name your *home security system* Minas Morgul
12/29/25, 02:42 PM
"Why are you upset that I am using The One Ring? Can't you just be civil about me using the Ring of Sauron for my own purposes? But I, Boromir, am not evil. Why are you all drawing your swords on me? Well fuckit, I guess I simply need to kill you all now, as you have all turned against me."
12/29/25, 02:25 PM
Very. Tolkien's distrust of industrialization comes out in many places.
12/29/25, 02:22 PM
By “appearing on the scene” you mean the company referencing a relatively minor, now ended crime wave as its origin story with a product that clearly isn’t going to exist anytime soon even tho it’s already a year overdue, named after a despotic character defeated by a little gremlin guy w/big feet
12/29/25, 02:20 PM
The LOTR references are a tell
12/29/25, 02:20 PM
What could possibly go wrong? I’m convinced these tech-assholes have never actually read LotR.
dear god please no more Tolkien names
"I'm starting to think these guys did read the books they're just taking the wrong messages from them."
12/29/25, 02:05 PM
Okay. Just for you, I'll change the name of my new food delivery system for the ultra-rich from it's planned Tolkien based name to Human~Centipede
12/29/25, 02:02 PM
The 10th Crusade, but first a word from our sponsor, Whatever Tolkien Imagery Hasn't Been Inappropriately Used Yet Enterprises
12/29/25, 02:02 PM
EVERY company that has taken a name from Lord of the Rings turns out to be evil. Exception: Asheville has Imladris Farms, but Lothlorien woodworking studio was destroyed by Hurricane Helene.
12/29/25, 01:47 PM
Tech bros are literally the stupidest high IQ fools on fictional middle earth. Palantir, Sauron, Oracle?!? They spent too much time rolling the 64 sided die and now we all are paying the price.
12/29/25, 01:45 PM
A home security company named Sauron.... ok
I'm starting to think these guys did read the books they're just taking the wrong messages from them.
"I'm starting to think these guys did read the books they're just taking the wrong messages from them."
12/29/25, 01:45 PM
dear god please no more Tolkien names
12/29/25, 01:43 PM
Yes. Spend the next 9 - 12 hours (depending on the versions you choose) in middle earth.
12/29/25, 01:35 PM
Sauron. They named the company Sauron. I can’t even.
12/29/25, 01:33 PM
We are so, so close to someone just going ahead and naming their company Torment Nexus.
"Podrobuji si Sarumanovi špehy, den dva."
12/29/25, 01:33 PM
Počkej až naopak přiletí havran a začne recitovat.
12/29/25, 01:33 PM
Kinda dumb to pay a bunch of money for Sauron when you can just buy Ring
Are you a despot with near-absolute power, but still worry that some filthy hobbitses might infiltrate your heavily fort...
"Are you a despot with near-absolute power, but still worry that some filthy hobbitses might infiltrate your heavily fortified estate to mess with your jewelry? Then we’ve got the product for you! Call 1-800-OrcsNow and we’ll throw in the ninth cursed soul of man free of charge, while society lasts!"
12/29/25, 01:31 PM
So let me get this straight: affluent tech bros, panicking over an empirically false “crime wave” in SF, copy a movie-style militarized security fantasy (e.g., Homewrecker), where it always ends badly, and name it after a character famous for failing to protect his home despite his power and wealth?
12/29/25, 01:31 PM
The grumpiest part of me can't help but say "LOTR??? Really?? Are you still a teenager??"
12/29/25, 01:26 PM
I don't think there's a funnier example of naming a company after a character who sucked at what the company claims to do than naming a home monitoring system after Sauron. Like Freddy Krueger Sleep Number Beds or Event Horizon Travel Services are there, but a tier below. Tony Montana Detox?
12/29/25, 01:22 PM
Problematic isn't the right word. In the context of LotR, Anduril is unambiguously positive. In the context of arrested development tech dudebros raised on "West is best" memes, though, it's just straightup naming a company "flame of the West". It's not even a dogwhistle.
12/29/25, 01:17 PM
Sauron?! Well I guess someone didn't finish the book.
12/29/25, 01:12 PM
Introducing Sauron! Inspired by the JRR Tolkien novel “Sauron is the bad guy, why the fuck would you name a home security system after him”
12/29/25, 01:08 PM
The CPO's name is literally "Merlin the Cowherd." The whitest wizard. "Saruman says he was drawn to Sauron by both the mission and an opportunity to solve a real problem. “I like the deterrence aspect — changing people’s minds before they make a bad decision and get into trouble,” he said."
12/29/25, 01:04 PM
The Eye of Sauron is the perfect symbol for a security company, because in the story it sees everything and definitely doesn't overlook the very people it's searching for as they break into its own home.
12/29/25, 01:00 PM
I am skeptical of an orc joining the Sons of Lothar to begin with, but not receiving ANY story about it adds an extra layer of frustration to an already strange choice.
12/29/25, 12:48 PM
Podrobuji si Sarumanovi špehy, den dva.
"Yet another evil tech company stealing a Tolkien name is so boring at this point. Sauron, Palantir, Anduril. ::yawn:: Call me when someone called a period app Ungoliant."
12/29/25, 12:45 PM
Entmoot would be such a great name for a chill chat space.
12/29/25, 06:01 AM
@xgranade It occurred to me the other day that a lot of them probably think like Saruman. I mean, think about it: Saruman, always the smartest guy in the room, decides that his high INT score implies a high WIS score as well. (To be fair, people _did_ call him "Saruman the Wise," which probably […]

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Sauron